We Can Do It

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 8 years ago, this month,  my husband, Captain Matthew Kelley, came home after a one year deployment to Iraq. He left when Sam was just 9 months old and Gracie who was not yet 2. I didn't know how I was going to make it, without family near by, alone in the Mojave Desert. I almost went home and then God said "stay" and I am so glad I did. Equipped with my faith, my family and some amazing battle buddies we did it. I grew in ways I never thought possible. No longer was I "just a stay at home mom", I had become a warrior.

A warrior who had crawled on the floor to heat up chicken nuggets when I was sick, so that my babies had something to eat.

A warrior because every night before bed I would turn on daddy, a previously recorded video of my husband reading to our kids and I would choke back the tears as they would bang on the tv and call his name.

 A warrior that drank $3.00 bottled champagne almost every Friday night with my battle buddies, heroically taking over bouncy castles so that we could let our hair down and find joy when it was some days impossible to find.

  A warrior that cleaned and organized the home of a friend with my other warriors whose husband had been injured in the fight so that she'd have less stress when they got back.

  A warrior because Uncle's came in baking birthday cakes and helping to decorate for their niece's 2nd birthday and sit in on first hair cuts so that our little man could make it through with plenty of distractions!

  A warrior that sat with my battle buddy in an emergency room praying my little girl would make it through surgery after a nasty fall while my other battle buddy, who had to get up at 4:30 the next morning took precious care of my baby boy so that I could be completely present for my daughter.

   A warrior that attended memorials of Army sisters whose husbands didn't make it back. We wiped our tear stained faces on the shoulders of our sisters in arms when the burden of moving forward felt too heavy. We will never forget the lives and sacrifice of Captain Ralph J. Harting III and Captain Stephen Franks nor their wives and children and their families. Grateful.

   We were warriors that celebrated our anniversaries all together knowing the sting of being alone on that sacred day would be unfamiliar territory that we weren't willing to explore....just yet.

  A warrior that borrowed a friend's car in a moment's notice when mine broke down on the way to Vegas to see my husband for RR...and I did make it to see him.

  A warrior that fought off RATS with my battle buddies that had taken over our homes when their homes had been destroyed due to new construction.

   We were warriors because holidays became events without daddy and sometimes too painful to stomach so we'd pull ourselves together like we'd done before and created new traditions at the home's of our fellow Army sisters. We'd each bring a dish, some would make too much, some wouldn't make enough but in the end our hearts were full and we counted our blessings that we made it through another holiday and another month!

 We were warriors that threw each other birthday parties knowing that our families were to far away to make it and in turn becoming family for one another!

  We were warriors because the night before our husbands were due to come home we got a call that they would not be coming home and hence once more we were thrown back into the world of hurry up and wait! However, as all good Army wives do, we gathered together and as nights before said "We'll drink to that!" And we did!

   A warrior because somewhere deep inside my sleepless, stress induced, frazzled brain came up with the idea for our coffee group to dress up like Rosie the Riveter for a community chili cook off. Threading our hearts and talents together once more and winning best props we realized "We can do it!!" "We will do it!"  "We did do it!"

       We were warriors that knew how to celebrate when the guys got home and so we did!

8 years later my experiences in that solemn desert are some of the darkest and brightest hours of not only my life but of my Army sisters and we are living proof that there is value in suffering. As this January wraps up, to my Rosie's where ever you are...thank you for your love, support, prayers and friendships because without you deployments wouldn't be what they are! Grateful!